You’ve been chatting to someone on a dating app and they ask for your number. It feels like a natural next step, but it’s worth pausing. Your phone number can reveal more about you than you might think, and it’s one of the things romance scammers try to get early.
The short answer
- There's no need to share your number before you're ready. A genuine match will understand.
- A sensible point is after a video call, or just before a first date, to arrange where to meet.
- Use the app's own messaging and calls for as long as you like.
- Anyone who pushes hard for your number very early is showing a warning sign.
Why it’s worth waiting
- Your number can be linked to other information. It may connect to your WhatsApp profile photo, social media accounts or other details online.
- It’s harder to step back. Once someone has your number, you can’t simply unmatch them. You’d need to block them.
- It moves you away from the app’s safety tools. Dating apps can check suspicious accounts and let you report people. Your phone can’t.
When it makes sense to share it
For most people, a good time is:
- after a video call (on the app if it offers one), so you know they’re genuine, or
- shortly before your first date, so you can message about arrangements or let them know if you’re running late.
If you’ve been chatting happily for a while and have had a video call, sharing a number is a normal step.
Safer alternatives
- Keep chatting on the app until you meet. There’s nothing wrong with that.
- Use in-app voice or video calls where the app offers them. Your number stays private.
- Check your WhatsApp privacy settings before sharing, so strangers can’t see your profile photo or details. See our guide to romance scams on WhatsApp.
What if they push for it?
It’s reasonable for someone to ask once. It’s a warning sign if they:
- ask for your number in the first few messages
- say they’re “about to delete the app” and need to move off it now
- get annoyed or pressure you when you’d rather wait
- won’t do a video call but still want your number
A simple, friendly reply works: “I’d like to keep chatting on here until we’ve had a video call, if that’s OK.” Someone genuine will be fine with that.
Before the first date
Whether or not you’ve shared numbers:
- Meet in a public place, in daylight if possible.
- Tell a friend where you’re going and who you’re meeting.
- Arrange your own transport there and back.
See how long to message before meeting for more on timing, and our guide to dating app scams for the warning signs to know.