If you’ve lost your wife or partner, writing a dating profile can feel strange, even disloyal. Many widowers haven’t described themselves on paper since a job application decades ago. You may not know whether to mention your late wife, how much to say, which photos to use, or how to come across as warm and ready without sounding either stuck in the past or as if you’ve forgotten it. And many men find it hard to write about feelings at all.
This guide gives example dating profiles for widowers, written for different ages, situations and kinds of relationship, with notes on why each works. It also covers how to mention being widowed, photos, headlines and prompt answers, before-and-after rewrites, and common mistakes. All the examples are written by us to show different approaches. They aren’t real people’s profiles, and they’re meant to be adapted to your own life and voice.
The short answer
- A brief, warm mention of being widowed usually works well. You don't need to explain what happened.
- Focus your profile on who you are now: your interests, your personality and what you're looking for.
- Specific details, such as the walk you do every Sunday or the dish you've learned to cook, make a profile much easier to reply to.
- Use recent, clear photos of yourself alone, ideally doing things you enjoy. Avoid photos with your late wife, even cropped.
- Be clear about what you want: companionship, a relationship, or someone to share outings with.
- Profiles that talk mainly about loss, or read like a request to be looked after, can put people off. Show that you have a life of your own.
Before you start
Writing your profile may bring up feelings you weren’t expecting. That’s normal. Some things that help:
- Draft it in a notebook or on your computer first, rather than straight into the app
- Ask a friend, sibling or adult child you trust to read it, if you’re comfortable
- Keep it simple. A short, honest profile is better than a long one you don’t feel comfortable with
- Remember you can change it whenever you like
If you’re unsure whether you’re ready to date, our guides to dating after losing a wife and dating after bereavement may help.
How to mention being widowed
| Approach | Example | Works well if |
|---|---|---|
| A brief, warm mention | “Widowed after 35 happy years, and ready to enjoy some company again.” | You want to be open from the start |
| Just your status | Choose “widowed” in the app’s settings | You’d prefer to explain in conversation |
| A gentle hint | “After a long, happy marriage, I’m starting a new chapter.” | You don’t want to use the word “widower” |
| Not mentioning it | Explain once you’ve started chatting | You prefer to share personal details in person |
Mentioning it early can help people understand where you are. But it’s your choice. Our guide to what to say on your dating profile after divorce or bereavement explores this further.
Choosing photos
- Make your first photo a clear, smiling picture of your face, without sunglasses or a hat
- Include a full-length photo, so people get a fair impression
- Show your interests, such as walking, golf, fishing, cooking, travel or the allotment
- Avoid photos with your late wife, even if you crop her out
- Avoid lots of group photos, where it’s hard to tell which one is you
- Ask someone to take new photos if you only have old ones
Our guide to dating profile photos after 50 has more detail.
Example profiles for widowers
1. Widowed in his fifties, looking for a relationship
“Widowed three years ago after 26 good years. I’m an engineer, a keen cyclist and a better cook than I used to be (my lasagne is getting rave reviews from my grown-up kids). I love being outdoors, live music and a decent pub with a fire. Looking for a warm, down-to-earth woman who enjoys laughter and conversation, and fancies sharing some adventures.”
Why it works: It mentions being widowed briefly, then shows plenty of personality and specific details.
2. Widowed in his sixties, looking for companionship
“I lost my wife two years ago and I’m ready to enjoy some company again. I’m retired, love walking the dog, watching rugby, and visiting castles and old churches. I’d like to meet someone for days out, lunches and good conversation. Happy to take things slowly and see where it goes.”
Why it works: It’s honest about wanting companionship and going gently, which helps attract people who want the same.
3. Widowed some years ago, active and outgoing
“Widowed seven years ago, and these days I’m making the most of life. I’ve walked the Camino, taken up sailing and help run a local walking group. I’m sociable, optimistic and always planning the next trip. Looking for an independent woman who loves the outdoors and fancies some company along the way.”
Why it works: It shows a full, active life, so it reads as an invitation to share it rather than a request to fill a gap.
4. Widowed in his seventies
“I’m 74, widowed and still very much enjoying life. I play bowls, volunteer at the local hospice shop and love a game of chess. I’m a proud grandad of six. I’d like to meet a kind lady for conversation, outings and good company. Old-fashioned manners, modern outlook.”
Why it works: It’s warm, clear and specific. Our guide to dating at 70 and beyond has more for this stage.
5. Widowed young, with children at home
“I was widowed four years ago and I’m a dad to two children, now 12 and 15. Life is busy, between work, football runs and homework, but I’m ready to meet someone. I enjoy running, cooking, films and a good curry. I’m looking for someone kind and patient, who has a life of their own and understands that my kids come first.”
Why it works: It’s honest about his situation and priorities. Widowed and Young (WAY) supports people widowed before their 51st birthday. Our guide to dating with teenagers at home may also help.
6. After caring for his wife
“After several years caring for my wife, I lost her last year. I’m now slowly getting back to the things I love: fishing, woodwork, and Sunday lunches with friends. I’m calm, practical and loyal. I’d like to meet someone to share some good times with. No rush, just good company.”
Why it works: It gently explains why he may take things slowly. Our guide to feeling guilty about dating after losing your partner may help if that’s a feeling you recognise.
7. Faith is important
“Widowed five years ago. My faith has been a great strength, and I’m involved in my local parish. I enjoy walking, choral music, gardening and a good detective series. I’d like to meet a kind woman of faith to share conversation, outings and perhaps more. Honesty matters a great deal to me.”
Why it works: It’s clear about what matters to him. Our guides to Christian dating after 50 and Catholic dating after 50 may help.
8. Prefers to keep his own home
“Widowed and settled in my own home, which I’d like to keep. I’m looking for a companion for meals out, theatre trips and holidays, but not to move in together. I love history, jazz, a good malt and long walks on the beach. Independent, but would love someone to share things with.”
Why it works: It’s honest about wanting a relationship while living apart. Our guide to living apart together after 50 explores this.
9. Not a natural writer
“Not much of a writer, so I’ll keep it short. Widowed, 66, retired joiner. I like walking, football, my allotment and a pint with friends. I’m told I’m a good listener and handy around the house. Looking for a kind woman for days out and a bit of fun.”
Why it works: It’s honest, friendly and specific. Short profiles can work well when they’re warm.
10. Humorous
“Widowed, 63, and now in charge of my own laundry, with mixed results. I love golf (badly), cooking (better) and travelling (whenever possible). Looking for a woman with a sense of humour, who won’t judge my ironing.”
Why it works: Gentle self-deprecating humour shows warmth. Our guide to short and funny profile examples has more.
11. Looking for someone who understands loss
“Widowed four years ago. I’d love to meet someone who understands that you can treasure the past and still look forward. I enjoy walking, cooking, cinema and visiting my grandchildren. Kindness and a sense of humour matter most.”
Why it works: It’s warm and honest about hoping for someone who understands. Our guide to whether widows and widowers should date each other explores this.
12. New to dating after a very long marriage
“I was married for 42 years and haven’t dated since I was 21, so forgive me if I’m a bit rusty. I’m widowed, retired and enjoy walking, the garden and a good crossword. Looking for someone kind to share coffee, conversation and maybe a bit of fun. Happy to go slowly.”
Why it works: Honesty about being new to dating can be endearing, and makes it easy to reply. Our guide to first dates after years of marriage can help.
Headline and opening-line ideas
- “Widowed, positive and ready for a new chapter”
- “Looking for good company and good conversation”
- “Learning to cook, still learning to dance”
- “Grateful for the past, looking forward to the future”
- “Kind, practical and up for an adventure”
- “Coffee, a walk and a chat?”
Example prompt answers
“I’m looking for” “Someone kind and independent, who enjoys the outdoors and a good laugh.”
“My simple pleasures” “A Sunday walk, a roast dinner and the cricket on the radio.”
“I’ll know I’ve found the one when” “We’re still chatting long after the coffee’s gone cold.”
“Something you should know about me” “I’m widowed, and my late wife will always be part of my story. I’m also very ready to write new chapters.”
“A shower thought I recently had” “Why does the shop always run out of the one biscuit I like?”
Before and after: rewriting a profile
Before: “Lost my wife two years ago. Lonely and looking for someone to look after me. Good with DIY.”
After: “Widowed two years ago, and ready to enjoy some company again. I’m practical, good with my hands and love walking, the garden and a good film. Looking for someone kind for days out and conversation.”
Why the rewrite works: The first version sounds like a request for help. The second shows who he is and what he can share.
Before: “My wife was perfect and no one will ever replace her.”
After: “I had a happy marriage, and I’m now looking for something new and different.”
Why the rewrite works: It honours his marriage while making room for someone new.
What to avoid
- Making the profile mainly about your loss. A brief mention is enough.
- Sounding as if you need looking after. Some people are wary of a partner who seems to want a carer or housekeeper.
- Long lists of requirements, especially about appearance or age.
- Setting a very young age range. It may mean few matches. Our guide to using dating app filters well after 50 explains why.
- Old photos, or photos with your late wife.
- Too much personal information, such as your full address or financial details.
Our guide to what never to put in a dating profile has more.
Once you’ve matched: first message ideas
A good profile gets you matches. A good first message gets conversations going. Keep it short, friendly and specific to her profile:
- “Your photo on top of Snowdon is impressive. Did you go up the hard way or take the train?”
- “I see you love the theatre. What’s the best thing you’ve seen this year?”
- “Fellow gardener here. What are you growing at the moment?”
- “You mention you’ve just come back from Portugal. Where did you go? It’s on my list.”
- “I noticed you volunteer at the food bank. How did you get involved?”
Avoid opening with compliments about her looks, long paragraphs about yourself, or talking about your late wife straight away. If the conversation goes well, it’s usually fine to suggest a phone call or a coffee within a week or two. Our guides to how to start a conversation on a dating app and how long to message before meeting have more.
If your family helps with your profile
Some widowers ask an adult son or daughter to help set up an app or write a profile. That can work well, especially if technology isn’t your strong point. A few things to bear in mind:
- Make sure it still sounds like you. If the words are someone else’s, conversations and dates may feel mismatched.
- Keep control of your messages. It’s fine to ask for help with the app, but conversations are best handled yourself.
- Be prepared for mixed feelings. Children may be supportive, but it can still be emotional for them to see a parent dating. Our guide to telling family you’re dating again after bereavement may help.
- Protect your privacy. Only share log-in details with people you trust completely, and change them if you’re unsure.
Updating your profile over time
Your first profile doesn’t need to be perfect. Many widowers find what they want to say changes once they’ve been on a few dates. It’s worth revisiting it every month or two to add new photos, update what you’re looking for, and add any new interests.
Staying safe
Romance scammers sometimes target widowed men, often using photos of attractive younger women. Warning signs include someone much younger who is very keen very quickly, won’t video call, claims to be overseas, or asks for money, gift cards or investment. Our guides to dating app scams targeting over-50s, crypto romance scams and how to spot a fake dating profile explain the patterns. Our Scam Red-Flag Checker can help if you’re unsure.
Writing your own
A simple structure:
- A line about your situation, if you’d like to mention it
- Two or three specific interests
- A line or two about your personality
- What you’re looking for
- An easy invitation, such as “Fancy a coffee?”
Our Profile Builder can help, and our guide to dating profile examples for men over 50 has more examples.
Frequently asked questions
Should I say I’m a widower on my profile?
It’s up to you. A brief, warm mention often helps, as it avoids surprises. Some men prefer to explain in conversation.
How much should I say about my late wife?
A line is usually enough on a profile. You can share more as you get to know someone. Our guide to talking about your late partner on early dates has more.
What photos should I use?
Recent, clear photos of you alone, including a smiling face photo and one showing an interest. Avoid photos with your late wife.
I’m not good at writing about myself. What should I do?
Keep it short and specific. Mention a few things you enjoy and what you’re looking for. A friend or our Profile Builder can help.
What age range should I set?
A realistic range, often around ten years either side of your own age, usually works best.
How do I say I want companionship rather than romance?
Say it clearly and warmly, for example: “Looking for a companion for days out and good conversation.”
Related guides
- Dating profile examples for over-60s
- Dating profile examples for over-70s
- Dating after losing a wife: a guide for widowers
- Dating profile examples for widows
- Dating profile examples for men over 50
- What to say on your dating profile after divorce or bereavement
- Dating after bereavement: when is the right time?
- Should widows and widowers date each other?
Sources
- Hearts Again editorial guidance on dating profiles; all example profiles are written by Hearts Again and are not real people’s profiles.
- Widowed and Young (WAY), support for people widowed before 51.