What to Say on Your Dating Profile After Divorce or Bereavement

Writing a dating profile is hard enough. Writing one after a divorce or the death of a partner brings extra questions. Should you mention that you’re divorced or widowed? How much should you say? What relationship status should you choose? Is it OK to use a photo that was taken when you were married? How do you sound positive without seeming to gloss over what you’ve been through?

This guide explains how to handle your past on a dating profile after divorce or bereavement: what to choose as your relationship status, whether and how to mention it in your bio, examples you can adapt, photo pitfalls, what to leave out, and how to keep the focus on who you are now.

The short answer

Choose an honest relationship status, such as divorced, separated or widowed. It sets expectations and avoids awkwardness later.
You don't need to explain your past in your bio. A brief, positive line is plenty, if you mention it at all.
Keep the focus on who you are now: your interests, values and what you're looking for.
Avoid mentioning your ex, the reasons for your divorce, or details of your partner's death.
Check your photos: no ex-partners cropped out, no late spouse, and no wedding ring on your ring finger.
It's fine to mention children and grandchildren briefly and warmly.

Your relationship status

Most dating apps ask for your relationship status. Choose the most accurate option.

Divorced: if your divorce is complete.
Separated: if you’ve separated but the divorce isn’t final. Being honest here helps you meet people who are comfortable with your situation. Our guide on whether you can date before your divorce is final explains the practical side.
Widowed: if your partner has died. Some people prefer “single” if the loss was many years ago, but “widowed” is often helpful, as it explains your situation without words.
Single: if none of the above applies, or if your last relationship wasn’t a marriage.

An honest status saves you from awkward conversations later, and from meeting people who would prefer someone with a different history.

Should you mention it in your bio?

You don’t have to. Your status already tells people the basics. But a short, positive line can help, particularly if you’re widowed, or if your divorce has shaped what you’re looking for.

A good line is

brief: one sentence is enough;
positive or neutral: it focuses on where you are now;
forward-looking: it hints at what you’re ready for.

Examples after divorce

“Divorced a few years ago and enjoying this new chapter.”
“After a long marriage, I’m rediscovering the things I love, and I’d love someone to share them with.”
“Divorced, on good terms, with two grown-up children I’m very proud of.”
“Separated last year and ready to meet new people, slowly and with a smile.”

Examples after bereavement

“Widowed after a long, happy marriage. I’m ready to enjoy life and laugh again.”
“I lost my husband a few years ago. It taught me what matters: kindness, humour and good company.”
“Widowed, with a houseful of memories and a heart that’s open to new ones.”
“After losing my wife, I’ve learned to appreciate the small joys. I’d love to share a few with someone new.”

What to avoid

Explaining why your marriage ended.
Criticising your ex, even jokingly, such as “My ex took the house, but I kept the dog.”
Describing your partner’s illness or death.
Presenting yourself as broken, such as “Still healing, be gentle with me.”
Lists of what you don’t want because of your past, such as “No cheaters, no liars, no drama.”
Lengthy reflections on grief or divorce.

These can put people off or make you seem not ready to move on, even if you are.

Keeping the focus on who you are now

The most important part of your profile isn’t your past. It’s you. A strong profile after divorce or bereavement looks much like any good profile:

What you enjoy, with specific details: the walks you take, the books you love, the food you cook.
How you spend your time: work, retirement, volunteering, family, hobbies.
Your personality: a hint of humour, warmth or curiosity.
What you’re looking for: companionship, a relationship, someone to share adventures with.

Our guides to writing a dating profile after 50 and profile examples for women and men over 50 have plenty more ideas.

Full profile examples

Here are complete examples you can adapt. Change the details so they reflect your own life.

After divorce: example 1

“Recently divorced after 26 years, and enjoying rediscovering myself. I’m a keen walker, a slightly obsessive gardener and a better cook than I used to be. I have two grown-up daughters who keep me on my toes. I’d love to meet someone kind and curious for walks, Sunday lunches and the occasional adventure. Let’s start with a coffee and see.”

After divorce: example 2

“Divorced, on good terms, and ready for the next chapter. I work part-time as an accountant and spend the rest of my time cycling, playing the guitar badly and planning trips. Looking for someone with a good sense of humour who enjoys getting outdoors. Bonus points if you know a good pub with a fire.”

After bereavement: example 1

“Widowed three years ago after a long and happy marriage. I’ve spent the time since rediscovering old interests: choir, painting and long walks with my spaniel, Monty. I’m close to my son and grandchildren. I’d love to meet someone warm, thoughtful and fond of good conversation, for companionship and perhaps more.”

After bereavement: example 2

“I lost my wife a few years ago, and I’ve learned to take life a day at a time and enjoy it. I’m a retired teacher, a keen reader and a hopeful golfer. I love visiting new places, especially somewhere by the sea. Looking for a kind companion to share days out, good food and laughter.”

Separated, divorce in progress

“Separated and taking things slowly. I’m a nurse, a keen swimmer and a devoted aunt. I’d like to meet someone kind and easy-going for coffees, walks and good conversation, and see where it goes.”

Photo pitfalls after divorce or bereavement

Photos can give away more than you realise. Check yours carefully.

No ex-partner or late spouse. Don’t use photos with your ex or late partner in them, even partly visible.
No obvious cropping. A photo with an arm around your shoulder and the rest cut off looks awkward and raises questions.
No wedding ring on your ring finger. If you still wear your ring, consider moving it to your right hand or removing it for photos, so people don’t assume you’re married. Our guide to wedding rings, photos and belongings when dating again covers this in more detail.
Recent photos. Photos from your married years may be quite old. Use photos from the last year or two.
No family photos with children’s faces, unless you’re comfortable with that. Many people prefer not to show children or grandchildren on dating apps.
Show your life now. New hobbies, travels and activities help tell the story of who you are today.

Our guide to dating profile photos after 50 has detailed advice.

Mentioning children and grandchildren

Children and grandchildren are often a big part of life after 50, and it’s natural to mention them. Keep it brief and warm, for example “I have two grown-up sons and a grandson who’s the light of my life.” You don’t need to share names, ages or photos.

If your children are young and live with you, it’s helpful to say so, as it affects how often you can meet: “Mum of two teenagers, so weekends can be busy, but I’d love to meet someone for coffee or walks during the week.”

Using prompts

Many apps, such as Hinge, use prompts instead of, or as well as, a written bio. You don’t need to use prompts to talk about your past. Choose ones that show who you are now. For example:

“A life goal of mine is… walking the whole of the South West Coast Path.”
“I’m looking for… someone who loves a good walk and a better pub lunch.”
“The way to win me over is… a good book recommendation.”

If you’d like to mention your past, a prompt such as “What I’ve learned recently is…” can work well: “Life is short, so say yes to the day trip.”

Before and after: rewriting a profile line

Small changes can transform how your past comes across.

Before: “Divorced after my husband cheated. Looking for someone honest this time.”

After: “Divorced and happier than I’ve been in years. I value honesty, kindness and a good laugh.”

Before: “Lost my wife to cancer two years ago. Still finding my way. Please be patient with me.”

After: “Widowed two years ago. I’ve been getting back to the things I love, and I’m ready to meet someone for walks, lunches and good conversation.”

Before: “Separated. It’s complicated.”

After: “Separated and taking things slowly. I’d love to meet someone for coffee and see how we get on.”

Before: “No drama, no games, no liars. I’ve had enough of that.”

After: “Looking for someone warm, straightforward and fond of a quiet night in as much as a day out.”

The “after” versions share the same facts but focus on the present and on what you’re looking for, rather than on the pain of the past.

Timing: updating your profile as you heal

Your profile doesn’t have to stay the same. As time passes after a divorce or bereavement, you may feel differently about what you want and how much you’d like to share. It’s a good idea to revisit your profile every few months:

refresh your photos;
update your interests and activities;
change what you’re looking for, if that has shifted;
remove or soften references to your past if they no longer feel relevant.

A profile that reflects who you are today will attract people who suit you today.

What you’re looking for: being honest

After divorce or bereavement, many people aren’t sure exactly what they want. That’s fine. It’s helpful to be honest in your profile:

“Looking for companionship and seeing where it leads.”
“Ready for a meaningful relationship, but happy to take things slowly.”
“Open to friendship first, romance if it happens.”
“Looking for someone to share adventures with, while keeping my own home and independence.”

Being clear helps you meet people who want the same. If you don’t want to marry again, or want to live apart, you can mention it. Our guide to when one partner wants marriage and the other wants companionship explains why this matters.

Privacy after divorce or bereavement

Dating profiles are visible to many people, and it’s wise to protect your privacy, especially if your divorce is ongoing or your family is sensitive about you dating.

Use your first name only.
Avoid naming your town precisely if it’s small, or mentioning your street or workplace.
Don’t mention your ex’s or late partner’s name.
Be careful with identifiable photos, such as your house, car registration or a well-known local landmark near your home.
Consider who might see your profile, such as your ex, your children or your late spouse’s family, and whether you’re comfortable with that.

Our guide on giving your phone number before a first date covers wider privacy steps.

When you’re asked about your past

Even with a light profile, matches may ask about your divorce or your late partner in early messages. Be ready with a brief, positive answer, and save the details for later. Our guides on talking about your divorce on a first date and talking about your late partner on early dates include example answers.

Common questions

“Should I say how long ago my divorce was?”

It can be helpful, especially if it’s recent. “Divorced last year” or “divorced a few years ago” sets expectations. You don’t need to give dates.

“Is it OK to say I’m widowed in my first line?”

Yes, if you’d like people to know straight away. Follow it with something positive about your life now.

“What if I don’t want to mention my past at all?”

That’s fine. Your relationship status will tell people the basics. Focus your bio on who you are now.

“Should I mention that my marriage was happy?”

If you’re widowed, a brief mention can be touching and helps explain your situation. If you’re divorced, it’s usually best not to comment on the quality of the marriage.

“Can I say I’m looking for someone who has also been through divorce or bereavement?”

You can, but it may narrow your matches. Many people who haven’t been through the same experience can still be understanding. Our guide on whether widows and widowers should date each other explores this.

A checklist before you publish

Is my relationship status accurate?
Have I kept any mention of my past brief and positive?
Have I avoided mentioning my ex or the details of my loss?
Does my bio focus on who I am now?
Have I said what I’m looking for?
Are my photos recent, with no ex or late spouse visible?
Is my wedding ring off my ring finger in photos?
Have I mentioned children or grandchildren briefly, if at all?
Would a friend recognise me from this profile?

The bottom line

After divorce or bereavement, choose an honest relationship status and keep any mention of your past brief, positive and forward-looking. The focus of your profile should be who you are now: your interests, values and what you’re looking for. Avoid mentioning your ex, the reasons your marriage ended or details of your partner’s death. Check your photos for ex-partners, late spouses and wedding rings. And be ready to talk about your past briefly and kindly when matches ask.

Frequently asked questions

Should I mention my divorce on my dating profile?

Your relationship status is enough, but a brief, positive line is fine if you’d like to include it.

Should I say I’m widowed?

Many people find it helpful to choose “widowed” as their status, and some add a brief line in their bio. It helps people understand your situation.

What should I avoid saying about my ex?

Anything negative, including jokes, the reasons for your divorce and details of the separation.

Can I use photos from when I was married?

Only if they’re recent, show just you and don’t show a wedding ring. Most people use photos from the last year or two.

What if I’m separated but not divorced?

Choose “separated” or the closest option, and be honest in early conversations.

How do I describe what I’m looking for?

Be honest and specific, for example “companionship and seeing where it leads” or “a meaningful relationship, taken slowly”.

Related guides

Sources

Discussion threads on Gransnet, Mumsnet and widowed communities about dating profiles after divorce and bereavement (themes summarised, not quoted).
Hearts Again editorial research on dating profiles after 50.