Romance fraud is one of the most painful crimes there is, because it attacks both your finances and your trust. It also disproportionately affects people who are dating later in life. This guide explains how the scams work, the warning signs to watch for, and exactly what to do if something doesn’t feel right.
The short answer
- UK victims reported losing more than £100 million to romance fraud in 2025, and people aged 55 to 74 accounted for almost half of the losses.
- Scammers are patient. They build trust over weeks or months before money is ever mentioned.
- The biggest red flags: moving you off the app quickly, avoiding video calls, and any request for money or "investments".
- Never send money, gift cards or crypto to someone you haven't met in person.
- If you're worried, stop, talk to someone you trust, call your bank, and report it.
How big is the problem?
According to City of London Police data from the Report Fraud service, UK victims reported losing around £102 million to romance scams in 2025, across more than 10,700 reports. That’s an average loss of around £9,500 per victim. People aged 55 to 74 accounted for almost half of all losses. Men made the most reports, but women lost the most money.
These figures only cover crimes that were reported. Many victims never come forward, often because they feel embarrassed. They shouldn’t: these are professional criminals, and anyone can be targeted.
How romance scams usually work
Most follow a recognisable pattern:
- The approach. An attractive, friendly profile gets in touch on a dating app or social media. They’re often very complimentary, very quickly.
- Moving off the app. They suggest switching to WhatsApp, text or email, often with a reason (“I’m hardly ever on here”).
- Building trust. Daily messages, good-morning texts, shared plans for the future. It can go on for weeks or months.
- The distance. They can’t meet or video call: working overseas, in the military, on an oil rig, travelling for work.
- The request. A sudden problem that money would solve (medical bills, customs fees, a frozen bank account, a plane ticket to come and see you), or an “investment opportunity”, often in cryptocurrency.
- Escalation. Once you’ve sent money once, the requests usually keep coming.
The red flags
Be very cautious if someone you've met online…
- declares strong feelings very quickly
- wants to move to WhatsApp or text straight away
- always has an excuse not to video call or meet
- says they work overseas, in the military or on an oil rig
- asks for money, gift cards, crypto, or help with a payment
- talks about an investment or trading platform that’s “made them a fortune”
- asks you to keep the relationship secret from friends or family
- has a story with details that change or don’t add up
How to check if someone is real
- Insist on a video call before things go any further. A genuine person will usually manage one.
- Reverse image search their photos. Upload them to Google Lens or TinEye to see whether the pictures appear elsewhere under different names.
- Search their name and details with words like “scam”.
- Ask a friend or relative for a second opinion. Police advice specifically recommends this. It’s much easier to spot the pattern from the outside.
- Stay on the dating app until you’re confident. Apps can check and remove fake profiles. See how to spot a romance scam on WhatsApp.
Investment scams: the newer version
Some fraudsters never ask for money for an emergency. Instead, they casually mention how well they’ve done trading crypto or foreign exchange, then offer to “help” you do the same. They may show you a convincing platform where your balance appears to grow, until you try to withdraw it. Any romantic contact who steers you towards investing is a serious warning sign.
What to do if you’re worried
If someone has asked you for money
- Stop. Don’t send anything else, and don’t reply while you think.
- Talk to someone you trust: a friend, relative or your bank.
- Call your bank straight away if you’ve already paid. You can dial 159 to be connected to your bank’s fraud team by many UK banks, or use the number on the back of your card.
- Report it: to Report Fraud on 0300 123 2040 or at reportfraud.police.uk (England, Wales and Northern Ireland), or to Police Scotland on 101.
- Report the profile to the dating app or social network.
You can also forward suspicious text messages to 7726, a free service that helps mobile networks block scam senders.
Beware “recovery” scams
After a romance scam, victims are sometimes contacted by people offering to recover their lost money for a fee. These are almost always scams too. Only deal with your bank, the police and organisations you’ve contacted yourself.
If it’s happened to you
Being scammed is not your fault. Romance fraudsters are organised criminals who use tested scripts, and they target kind, open, trusting people. Many victims feel grief as well as financial loss, because the relationship felt real. Talking to someone helps. Victim Support offers free, confidential help in England and Wales, and Victim Support Scotland does the same in Scotland.
Dating safely from the start
- Keep conversations on the dating app until you’ve had a video call or met.
- Don’t share your address, workplace or financial details early on.
- Meet in a public place and tell a friend where you’re going.
- Never send money to someone you haven’t met, whatever the reason.
Sources
- City of London Police, romance fraud data from the Report Fraud service for 2025 (published May 2026).
- City of London Police: Report Fraud has replaced Action Fraud for England, Wales and Northern Ireland (December 2025).