When you meet someone special later in life, the question of “what next” looks different from first time round. You may have homes, pensions, children and grandchildren to think about. Some couples remarry, some move in together, and a growing number choose to stay in their own homes. None of these is the “right” answer, but they have very different consequences.
The short answer
- There are three main options: marry (or form a civil partnership), live together unmarried, or live apart together.
- There is no such thing as "common law marriage" in England and Wales. Living together gives you very few automatic rights.
- In England and Wales, getting married cancels an existing will. In Scotland it doesn't.
- Remarrying or cohabiting can affect some survivor's pensions and benefits.
- Whatever you choose, update your will and talk openly about money.
The three main options
1. Marriage or civil partnership
Gives you the strongest legal protection as a couple: inheritance rights, financial claims if you separate, and recognition as next of kin in many situations. It also brings you and your finances together in law, which has consequences for children from earlier relationships.
2. Living together (cohabiting)
You share a home but aren’t married. It can feel like marriage day to day, but legally it’s very different, especially in England and Wales.
3. Living apart together
You’re a committed couple but keep separate homes. Your finances and property stay separate, which many people over 50 find simpler. See our full guide to living apart together after 50.
What most people don’t know about living together
Many people believe that after living together for a while, they become “common law” spouses. In England and Wales, common law marriage does not exist. Cohabiting couples don’t automatically inherit from each other, and have far fewer financial claims if they separate than married couples.
In Scotland, cohabitants have some limited rights to make financial claims when a relationship ends or a partner dies, but these are much narrower than for married couples, and there are strict time limits.
Marriage and your will
- In England and Wales, marriage automatically cancels (revokes) an existing will, unless the will was made in contemplation of that particular marriage. If you remarry and don’t make a new will, your estate may not go where you intended.
- In Scotland, marriage does not cancel an existing will. But your new spouse may have legal rights to part of your estate.
Either way, anyone marrying or moving in together later in life should review their will.
Pensions and benefits
Remarrying or cohabiting can affect some payments, particularly some survivor’s (widow’s or widower’s) pensions from workplace or public sector schemes, which may stop or change. Rules vary between schemes, so check the specific rules of any pension you receive before making a decision.
Comparing the options
Marriage suits you if…
- you want the security of legal recognition and inheritance rights
- you’re comfortable combining finances, or have agreed how to protect children’s inheritance
- marriage matters to you personally or for your faith
Living together suits you if…
- you want to share daily life but don’t want to marry
- you’ve both made wills and put agreements in place (a cohabitation agreement can help)
- you understand the limited legal protection, especially in England and Wales
Living apart together suits you if…
- you value independence and your own home
- you want to keep finances and property separate
- you want closeness without merging everything
Protecting children’s inheritance
This is one of the biggest concerns for couples over 50. Common approaches include making new wills, putting assets in trust, and in some cases a prenuptial or cohabitation agreement. The right approach depends on your circumstances and where in the UK you live.
Not legal or financial advice
This guide is general information. The law differs across England and Wales, Scotland and Northern Ireland, and your pensions, property and family situation all matter. Speak to a solicitor or regulated financial adviser before making decisions.
Questions to talk through together
- Where would we live, and who would own the home?
- What happens to each of our homes and savings if one of us dies?
- How would we share day-to-day costs?
- How do our children feel, and what would they inherit?
- What would happen if one of us needed care?
Having these conversations isn’t unromantic. It’s what lets a later-life relationship feel secure.
Sources
- House of Commons Library, “Common law marriage” and cohabitation (updated 2026).
- Guidance from UK solicitors on the effect of marriage on wills in England and Wales and in Scotland.